There is no good reason that I am writing. No big plan to renew past resolves at eating better, no big plan to start exercising again. But, it has been awhile and here I am; lamenting my issues. I was thinking about my trunk, ya know, the one my pants strain to cover. I was thinking it was a bit like Mary Poppins' carpet bag. She just kept pulling tons of crap out of it. How did she get a lamp in that sucker!? That is how my trunk is. I can just keep stuffing it with more and more crap and somehow, it all fits. And I am oh so good and stuffing more and more in it.
I hate being fat. I hate how I feel. I hate the physical pain I am in and I hate the emotional pain I am in. Yet I still feel SO helpless! I have tried almost everything that I can almost afford (most costly things I tried I really couldn't afford) It was all money down the drain. I have a food issue and I feel it is just out of control.
Ya know how the phrase "I'll start on Monday" is commonly used by the tragically fat person. Well, I like taking that to the next level. Go big or go home (no pun intended). We just moved to Utah and are living in the basement of a friends house. We have been here 25 days (except for the days that I was traveling in Oregon and Washington). For the chronically fat person, that kind of upset to the life is no fourm for dieting change. So, I am bowing out of the intense need to loose weight until I move into my new home and all the stress and craziness I am living thru is over. I am trying to buy my sisters TreadClimber so I can have something in the house I can just jump on and get the excercise thing done. I will work on the diet when the time comes.
So for now, I'm just here, fat, hurting, and unhappy with it all.
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Cranberry Meatballs
The naming of these was not easy.....again, I just had to go with simple and descriptive. These meatballs are a great party/potluck dish. So very easy to make and so very yummy.
Grab yourself these 3 ingrediants:
1 Bag of meatballs
1 Jar Chili sauce
1 can Cranberry sauce (no whole berries)
I used the large bag from Costco, but two smaller bags will do. You also don't have to make the whole bag, there will just be more sauce.
Defrost the meatballs in a microwave safe bowl in the microwave. When thawed, place them in a pan (I use my electric skillet) and brown them in a bit of olive oil for about 5 min.
In a large pot, empty the can of cranberries and jar of chili sauce. Heat and stir on a medium high heat until the cranberry sauce is pretty much disolved.
Once the meatballs are browned and the sauce heated thru, mix the meatballs in the sauce making sure to cover all the meatballs.
Thats it!
I serve these on brown rice if I am going to make them for dinner. I just don't use all the meatballs in the bag in order to have more sauce.
I will put these in the crockpot on a low heat to keep them warm if I'm taking them to an event.
Italian Squash Bake
Lets face it, I'm not going to win any awards for comming up with creative recipe names. I just try to make it short and descriptive. Like this one; I have some squash, I have some Italian stuff, I baked it.
I actually was going to make a different dish with my squash but was missing a couple of ingrediants so I improvised with this. There are a couple of changes I would do but it turned out pretty good.
Here is what you will need:
About 4 pieces of squash
A package of sausage
A 16oz bag of shredded mozerella
A jar of spaghetti sauce
Salt, pepper, seasonings
Preheat oven to 350
All I had was sliced cheese, I would change this to shredded the next time I make it.
Cut up the sausage and saute on medium high heat in a little bit of olive oil
While the suasage is cooking, cut the squash into bite sized pieces. I also added some Italian seasoning, salt and pepper.
Put the cut up squash on the bottom of a baking dish that has been lightly sprayed with a cooking spray.
Then place the cooked sausage over the top. Pour the jar of spaghetti sauce over the top and then cover it all with cheese. I also found some small pepperoni in my fridge so I sprinkled that on top. But it was just a last min addition.
I baked it for about 30 min until the cheese was melted and it was bubbling on the sides.
My kids really liked this and they got a great serving of veggies from this meal!
Green Chili Chicken Taco's
I love the crockpot. I love easy ways to make dinner. I love chicken. Put the three together and viola! You have endless ways to chow down with the family. Here is one way to make simple Mexican style chicken tacos.
Here is what you will need: 1lb of chicken breasts, a can of green enchalada sauce, a small can of green chilis, a jar of green salsa verde.
Toss your chicken in the crockpot, and throw the rest of the goodness on top.
Let that cook on med high (about 6 hrs). When it is cooked take a couple of forks and shred the chicken. I also add some salt and garlic powder to taste.
Thats it! Add it to your tortillas, put on some cheese, lettuce, tomato, cilantro or whatever you want and enjoy!
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Shake it Up!
Part of my efforts to become healthier is to eat better. This is uber hard. I have a million and one excuses I like to tell myself on various occasions to avoid eating better, like: I'll just start on Monday, I'll eat this yuckyness now and then eat better for the rest of the day, I can just do some house cleaning to burn off the extra calories etc.... Needless to say all of the excuses never amount to anything. I don't start Monday, I don't eat better the rest of the day and I for sure don't do extra house work that would come close to burning any calories.
One thing I am getting much better at is making a protein shake. They are easy and not to shabby in the taste department. I will usually use almond milk (we can get it at Costco and it is not so expensive) and then some spinach (also a Costco find) I buy the big bag and then fill sandwich bags full of spinach and then freeze them so there is no waste if I can't use the spinach fast enough. This is how I do it:
Then some fruit (frozen or fresh), a scoop of protein powder, and some ice. I have a super duper blender that does a fabu job of blending it all up. My kids usually will ask to share my shake with me.
One thing I am getting much better at is making a protein shake. They are easy and not to shabby in the taste department. I will usually use almond milk (we can get it at Costco and it is not so expensive) and then some spinach (also a Costco find) I buy the big bag and then fill sandwich bags full of spinach and then freeze them so there is no waste if I can't use the spinach fast enough. This is how I do it:
And then I just put the baggies back in the origional bag and put it in the freezer:
Then some fruit (frozen or fresh), a scoop of protein powder, and some ice. I have a super duper blender that does a fabu job of blending it all up. My kids usually will ask to share my shake with me.
The pink stuff in the middle is strawberry banana fish oil from Barleeans. I love the stuff and so do my kids. They are always asking for their fish oil.
So anyway, I am really going to make an effort to continue making better choices of what goes in my mouth. I know that making small steps forward is always better than making any steps backwards. I think as soon as I have a good habit down of incorporating my shake on a more daily basis, I can then decide what the next small step will be that I can focus on. Maybe no white bread, or no eating after 8:00, or even no fast food....ever! We shall just have to see.
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Rice and Beans
So this is a good one I got from my mom. My mom is a WONDERFUL cook. My husband actually wishes she lived with us just so he can enjoy her cooking more. And because she is such a swell lady. The great thing about this recipe is that it is pretty versitile. You can switch things up or if you are missing something, its not that big of a deal. You can taylor it to your likes and it will pretty much turn out good. It's hard to mess it up.
Here is what you will need:
Here is what you will need:
2 Cans Black beans (pinto would work as well)
4 cups cooked rice (white or brown)
Shredded cheese
Chicken
Sour Cream
Salsa
Cilantro
Seasonings
I know the ingredients are not really specific on quantity. This is just because you can do this to taste. The basics are beans and rice. From there you get to be the master of your own dish.
First, brown some chicken in a skillet with some seasoning (taco, salt, pepper, cumin, etc). Meat can be optional here. Oh, this is pre-sliced chicken I got on sale. You can just do the traditional chicken breast cooked and then chopped up.
Next, crack open your beans, rinse them and put them in a pan. Add some seasoning like onion and garlic. (or don't, you decide)
Here are the toppings I used
And here is the final dish. I love cilantro so I pile it on. For the kids I left off the cilantro.
This has the potential to be a really healthy meal. You can use brown rice or even quinoa. Use a low fat sour cream and sparingly on the cheese and, viola! There you go.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Change Up
I decided to change the name of this blog because I figured that the Juicing theme was only a small part of what I really want to accomplish with this. I know that this is going to be a lot more than just the way I accomplish my goal, but the why and how much did it hurt.
I really have always had a small giggle hiding inside when I hear the term "junk in the trunk" it is so descriptive for me. It can have many double meanings....or triple....quadruple. Anyway, I wanted the title to be more encompassing of what I am experiencing.
I really have always had a small giggle hiding inside when I hear the term "junk in the trunk" it is so descriptive for me. It can have many double meanings....or triple....quadruple. Anyway, I wanted the title to be more encompassing of what I am experiencing.
Dispair
So, I was listening to the radio on the way home from my therapy appt (yes, I am such a well adjusted person because I see a therapist on a regular basis. My background is in the mental health field so I feel I am just supporting my "peeps" out there) and there was an add for the latest and greatest diet drink. I think it was a drink....they talk so fast and want me to be sure to note that only the first 100 people to call are going to get to participate cuz gosh darn it, if you are person 101, you are out of luck! No diet juice for you!!!
Anyway, what grabbed my attention was the phrase "diet dispair". Why, that could be me! However; any company that thinks that I am dumb enough to believe that only 100 people are going to get their deal is a company that is not going to get my money. But I did have a long thot with myself on my state of diet despair and here is what me, myself, and I came up with.
We feel dispair. I know, deep; right? But there is so much truth in such a small, little word. I have such a feeling of dispair each time I step on that stupid scale and it shows me a number greater than the last number it showed me. I feel dispair each time I tell myself I am going to make good choices regarding food and excercise and I don't. I feel dispair when I think of what my husband has to work with...... I feel dispair when my 4 yr old tells me she doesn't want to be fat like me. I feel a lot of dispair.
I'm a pretty religious gal and I truly believe that in the scriptures when Christ says that he will not give us more burdens in our lives than we can handle, I believe Him. So all the more dispair on my part. I believe that my Heavenly Father has given me the tools and strength to accomplish what I need and to overcome any challenge, yet here I sit....fat.....unable to overcome. I hope He doesn't feel as much disappointment in me as I feel in myself.
As I type this I have tears in my eyes. I hope this isn't TMI but I really want to be honest with myself and what I am going thru. I figure that there are many more out there that have similar feelings about themselves as I do. I also use this as a form of accountability for myself. Now I think everyone has read this and is going to be watching all that enters the main portal on my face. I want people to say "hey, look at Marilyn, she did it. I know it was hard for her (cuz she let us all know) and she did it. I can do_____ as well." It may be presumptuous of me to think I could inspire anyone to do anything, but; you never know.
So this has turned into a WAY longer post than intended. And a little more personal than intended....sorry. But, I plan on using this more regularly as a way to find the strength and motivation to accomplish what is probably going to be the hardest challenge of my life. So heres to unloading my trunk of junk and shedding my cloak of dispair.
Anyway, what grabbed my attention was the phrase "diet dispair". Why, that could be me! However; any company that thinks that I am dumb enough to believe that only 100 people are going to get their deal is a company that is not going to get my money. But I did have a long thot with myself on my state of diet despair and here is what me, myself, and I came up with.
We feel dispair. I know, deep; right? But there is so much truth in such a small, little word. I have such a feeling of dispair each time I step on that stupid scale and it shows me a number greater than the last number it showed me. I feel dispair each time I tell myself I am going to make good choices regarding food and excercise and I don't. I feel dispair when I think of what my husband has to work with...... I feel dispair when my 4 yr old tells me she doesn't want to be fat like me. I feel a lot of dispair.
I'm a pretty religious gal and I truly believe that in the scriptures when Christ says that he will not give us more burdens in our lives than we can handle, I believe Him. So all the more dispair on my part. I believe that my Heavenly Father has given me the tools and strength to accomplish what I need and to overcome any challenge, yet here I sit....fat.....unable to overcome. I hope He doesn't feel as much disappointment in me as I feel in myself.
As I type this I have tears in my eyes. I hope this isn't TMI but I really want to be honest with myself and what I am going thru. I figure that there are many more out there that have similar feelings about themselves as I do. I also use this as a form of accountability for myself. Now I think everyone has read this and is going to be watching all that enters the main portal on my face. I want people to say "hey, look at Marilyn, she did it. I know it was hard for her (cuz she let us all know) and she did it. I can do_____ as well." It may be presumptuous of me to think I could inspire anyone to do anything, but; you never know.
So this has turned into a WAY longer post than intended. And a little more personal than intended....sorry. But, I plan on using this more regularly as a way to find the strength and motivation to accomplish what is probably going to be the hardest challenge of my life. So heres to unloading my trunk of junk and shedding my cloak of dispair.
Monday, July 2, 2012
Lets just say I didn't gain it all back
The title kinda says it all. I am going to go with the positive and say that I did do 10 days and lost 10lbs. Not too bad. I did ease my headaches in the process and give myself a good education on which veggies and fruits make a good juice.
So, my quest-struggle-fight-desire to loose weight and get healthy continues. I am pretty sure that I have coded genes that want to stay fat. I really think my body has some sort of desire to keep the chubby on. I don't know, it's just so frustrating that all the effort in the world doesn't seem make much of a difference.
I'm going to go back to my origional plan of just small steps to a life of health and less of the junky trunk. I just have to keep telling myself that this is something I can do. I CAN DO hard things. Like today, for example; I had a protein shake instead of cereal. I LOVE cereal. So I had it for lunch and dinner. BUT, one good decision is better than no good decisions. Tomorrow will be a protein shake AND a trip to the gym. Howz that for baby steps.
So, as I wage my daily war with myself. I will try to keep in mind that many, many more before me have fought this battle, and many more will after me. So why can I join the ranks of those that won the war (or at least more battles than not).
So, my quest-struggle-fight-desire to loose weight and get healthy continues. I am pretty sure that I have coded genes that want to stay fat. I really think my body has some sort of desire to keep the chubby on. I don't know, it's just so frustrating that all the effort in the world doesn't seem make much of a difference.
I'm going to go back to my origional plan of just small steps to a life of health and less of the junky trunk. I just have to keep telling myself that this is something I can do. I CAN DO hard things. Like today, for example; I had a protein shake instead of cereal. I LOVE cereal. So I had it for lunch and dinner. BUT, one good decision is better than no good decisions. Tomorrow will be a protein shake AND a trip to the gym. Howz that for baby steps.
So, as I wage my daily war with myself. I will try to keep in mind that many, many more before me have fought this battle, and many more will after me. So why can I join the ranks of those that won the war (or at least more battles than not).
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Day 7
Man, talk about testing my limits! I had another hard day. I ran over a screw this morning and my tire was ruined. So $160 later and half the day gone I got a new tire. I did get to go to my favorite grocery store to stock up on more fruits and veggies, so there is the silver lining.
All life stress aside, today was not so bad. I made sure I drank more juice and more water. I didn't feel as hungry and I wasn't as tired as I have been. I did decide to take a bath in the middle of the day. I justified it by calling it a "detox bath". Very necessary when juicing...
I've decided to jot down some things I have learned in the past week of juicing. So here they are (in no particular order):
1. Juicing takes time! Thus I have decided to do it in the evening after the kids have gone to
bed. It makes my morning much easier and I am more prone to stay honest.
2. Never stray far from a bathroom. There is A LOT of liquid flowing thru the body!
3. Do not store veggies at room temp. They go bad much faster. Thus having two refrigerators
is very handy.
4. Whilst juicing, I find that rinsing the juicer half way thru helps to avoid build up of pulp that
ends up in my juice.
5. Celery is not good in juice.
6. Red cabbage, while a beautiful shade of purple, also does not taste so good in juice. But not
as bad a celery.
7. Juice is not so good at room temperature. I don't care if it is better for you that way.
Anyway, that is about it for today. I am pretty sure I can finish out the 10 days, however; I am worried about tomorrow. I have girls night with the friends and there is always lots of my favorite foods. So I think I am going to take some watermellon to snack on. When juiced, watermellon has almost no pulp left over. It is pretty much solid juice. So I figure if I am going to stray, that would be the best way to go. Here's to doing hard things!
All life stress aside, today was not so bad. I made sure I drank more juice and more water. I didn't feel as hungry and I wasn't as tired as I have been. I did decide to take a bath in the middle of the day. I justified it by calling it a "detox bath". Very necessary when juicing...
I've decided to jot down some things I have learned in the past week of juicing. So here they are (in no particular order):
1. Juicing takes time! Thus I have decided to do it in the evening after the kids have gone to
bed. It makes my morning much easier and I am more prone to stay honest.
2. Never stray far from a bathroom. There is A LOT of liquid flowing thru the body!
3. Do not store veggies at room temp. They go bad much faster. Thus having two refrigerators
is very handy.
4. Whilst juicing, I find that rinsing the juicer half way thru helps to avoid build up of pulp that
ends up in my juice.
5. Celery is not good in juice.
6. Red cabbage, while a beautiful shade of purple, also does not taste so good in juice. But not
as bad a celery.
7. Juice is not so good at room temperature. I don't care if it is better for you that way.
Anyway, that is about it for today. I am pretty sure I can finish out the 10 days, however; I am worried about tomorrow. I have girls night with the friends and there is always lots of my favorite foods. So I think I am going to take some watermellon to snack on. When juiced, watermellon has almost no pulp left over. It is pretty much solid juice. So I figure if I am going to stray, that would be the best way to go. Here's to doing hard things!
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Day 6
Ahhhhh!!!! Today has been so HARD!! I am walking the "give up on this crap" line. I have had a headache all day. Granted, my day was thrown off when I had to take Kiley to the Urgent Care for stitches. I wasn't planning on being away from home for so long so by the time I got home, I was sick with hunger.
I find that when the day is going poorly, the harder it is. Today was not a good day. Let me do the run down. Again, this is for future recolection so I want to get down some details.
1. Arrived late to Swim lessons
2. Kiley busted chin while swimming
3. Trip to urgent care thus missing an afternoon appt.
4. Ran out of juice and no energy to make more
5. Added a can of VERY spicy tomato sauce to dinner pasta on accident, no pasta for dinner
6. Cut my finger while chopping veggies for juice
7. Juicer crapping out on me (I hope it lasts til I am done with this.....or do I.....)
8. Had to pay bills
I wish I could be like that guy on the documentary where he just spends his 10 days at a vacation rental. Sometimes I feel like I am doing this just hour to hour. If I can just make it for one more hour, then we will see how I am doing and if I can go more.
On a more lighter note. One way I have kept going on this is just that I don't want all those veggies and fruits to go to waste and the fastest way to use them is to juice them. So anyway, that is day six. Oh, and I am down 9 lbs. total. So there's that.
I find that when the day is going poorly, the harder it is. Today was not a good day. Let me do the run down. Again, this is for future recolection so I want to get down some details.
1. Arrived late to Swim lessons
2. Kiley busted chin while swimming
3. Trip to urgent care thus missing an afternoon appt.
4. Ran out of juice and no energy to make more
5. Added a can of VERY spicy tomato sauce to dinner pasta on accident, no pasta for dinner
6. Cut my finger while chopping veggies for juice
7. Juicer crapping out on me (I hope it lasts til I am done with this.....or do I.....)
8. Had to pay bills
I wish I could be like that guy on the documentary where he just spends his 10 days at a vacation rental. Sometimes I feel like I am doing this just hour to hour. If I can just make it for one more hour, then we will see how I am doing and if I can go more.
On a more lighter note. One way I have kept going on this is just that I don't want all those veggies and fruits to go to waste and the fastest way to use them is to juice them. So anyway, that is day six. Oh, and I am down 9 lbs. total. So there's that.
Day 4 & 5
Wow, I am so behind... Mainly all of the days are about the same. I don't know if I am doing this wrong, but I feel hungry all of the time. I try to drink about 3 quarts of juice a day, but I still feel hungry. I also am drinking a lot of water as well. I feel like I am using Motrin way too much.
I have also found that juicing in the morning is really hard to do. I know that keeping fresh juice for a long amount of time is not recomended, but I figure 24 hours max is not too shabby. So I am juicing in the evening when the kids are down and I have more time. It makes me less crabby... Mornings are so busy with 4 kids demanding food of their own.
On a more personal note. I am feeling the force of my addiction. I so love food. I still am trying to come to terms of the extreme depths of this addiction. I am really good at just minimizing and justifying. I can argue with great pursuation that I just like food. Like some like golf, or video games, or scrapbooking. I like food. But the tell tale signs are there. Food gets in the way of my life. In the way of my relationship. It causes me emotional pain and causes me real health issues. I am finding giving up food to be one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I just miss food! Anyway, that is all I have energy for...
I have also found that juicing in the morning is really hard to do. I know that keeping fresh juice for a long amount of time is not recomended, but I figure 24 hours max is not too shabby. So I am juicing in the evening when the kids are down and I have more time. It makes me less crabby... Mornings are so busy with 4 kids demanding food of their own.
On a more personal note. I am feeling the force of my addiction. I so love food. I still am trying to come to terms of the extreme depths of this addiction. I am really good at just minimizing and justifying. I can argue with great pursuation that I just like food. Like some like golf, or video games, or scrapbooking. I like food. But the tell tale signs are there. Food gets in the way of my life. In the way of my relationship. It causes me emotional pain and causes me real health issues. I am finding giving up food to be one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I just miss food! Anyway, that is all I have energy for...
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Day 3
Another day, another 2 lbs. I feel pretty good! I did not have a headache when I woke up this morning and I had a lot more energy that I usually do. It felt wonderful to not feel like I need another 4 hours of sleep! I did feel hungry, but it was not so bad. I feel like I may have not had enough juice tho. I had to get all the juicing done before chuch and get the kids fed and ready and there just didn't seem to be enough time. The great thing is that I don't feel like I am at the point of giving up and just digging into a bowl of ice cream. Usually, when discomfort rears its ugly head, I will hold out for a short amount of time (cus I'm strong like that) but then give in (cuz I'm weak like that). This would be the behavior of an addict. I am addicted to food and I know it. So, not feeling like I need to give up is a great place for me to be.
So I decided to not blend my fruits and veggies, but to acually juice them in the juicer. Yesterday I blended them thinking it was going to be easier and I would get the benefit of the whole fruit or veggie. Well, after a chat with a friend and doing a bit more reasearch, I decided to go back to juicing. It does take more time and is more messy, but I do want the benefit of getting the pure juice straight to my blood stream. That would be the simplest way to put it. Anyway, its all juice for me! Not much more to add, I still look forward to getting on the scale tomorrow to see what good results are in store for me!
So I decided to not blend my fruits and veggies, but to acually juice them in the juicer. Yesterday I blended them thinking it was going to be easier and I would get the benefit of the whole fruit or veggie. Well, after a chat with a friend and doing a bit more reasearch, I decided to go back to juicing. It does take more time and is more messy, but I do want the benefit of getting the pure juice straight to my blood stream. That would be the simplest way to put it. Anyway, its all juice for me! Not much more to add, I still look forward to getting on the scale tomorrow to see what good results are in store for me!
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Day 2
It's not over yet....but, things are going swimmingly! I was a bit hungry yesterday, but that was fixed with extra juice and a nap. Lets be honest, a nap can cure about any ailment. The good news to go along with this is that I am down 3 lbs. This is not a loss of solid waste, but fat. No solid waste was lost in the past 24 hrs... Heaven knows I have an excess of fat that my body can feed on for an extended period of time.
I've thot a lot about how much I really wanted to share in this blog, and I decided that I would put it all out there. The more open and honest I am, the more accountable I feel. I guess that sharing more makes it more real and exposed. More real seems easier to deal with and address. Make sense? If not, just remember; I have been living off juice for almost two days.... Who knows what will happen in a couple more days.....pictures....??
So here are the physical issues I have been facing:
PCOS (Poly cystic ovarian syndrom). That about says it. I have multiple cysts that grow on my ovaries etc. It is painful, causes a ton of hormone issues and other issues that we don't need to get into here. I think this is the main reason I have not been able to have kids and have had a very difficult time loosing weight. You can learn more here.
Endometriosis: While undergoing surgery to remove one of my cysts, my doctor found some endometriosis. I even have some lovely pictures to show of it. Now this causes real pain on a monthly basis. Also causes fertility issues and messes with hormones. Go here to learn more about that.
Hemmoroids: Nuff said. I'm not even going to put a link cuz if you don't know what it is.....just do some of your own reasearch. Needless to say, constipation is an issue I deal with on a regular basis and the discomfort and pain that goes with the little bobbins on my downstairs are a major source of irritation and pain in my life.
Headaches: Ohhhhh, the headaches! I wake up almost every morning with a headache. Let me say that this morning, I did not! I was very happy about that little change in my morning. I try all kinds of things to help ease the pain: LOTS of pain killers, massage, pressure points, essential oils, water, etc. I am also very resistant to pain killers and other medications, so I have to pound down tons of pills to get any relief.
Joint Pain: I have really bad pain in my knees, back, shoulders, and feet. Mainly my knees and feet. Of course, I am a mom and am walking around, carrying kids, cleaning etc. every day. This does not help things. The main reason for so much pain is my weight. My poor knees and feet are just tuckered out carrying around this much weight.
Fatigue: I'm too tired to write any more...... No seriously, I am always tired. For the past 3-4 months I have been naping almost every day. I can't seem to make it thru the day without a nap. I am always so tired. Again, see above issues that are adding to my fatigue problem. I know my poor health plays a part in this.
So, there it is. In all it's glory. Just two months ago I had my physical and the Dr. recommended I get on a program to loose weight, but as mentioned earlier in the blog, that is not so easy for me. I do feel blessed that I don't have other health issues related to my weight such as high blood pressure, high cholestrol, diabetes, heart disease, etc. So, I am going to take it back old school. REAL OLD school. Like when folks lived off fruits and veggies cuz there was not always meat to eat. And since I don't want to join the ranks of those who suffered scurvy while going to the old school, I am going to consume LOTS of fruits and veggies and the best way to do so is by juicing them and allowing my body to absorb the nutrients right into the blood stream.
Now, I know that juicing can be controversial. I know that it can be extreme. I know that people can be very opinionated on such topics. However, no one seemed to be concerned (or voice concern), or opinionated while I was stuffing my face with toxic sugars, fats, preservitives, and calories. All of which have done my body a lot of harm. So, I would ask that as I am making an effort to cleanse all that crap from my body, that I get support and encouragement. As I have reasearched this topic, I have yet to find an incidence where some one has said "Man, I wish I had never done a cleansing juice fast. It ruined my life". I don't plan to be all crazy about it and I am very aware of how my body is responding. I am in no way writing this blog as a guidline for others to follow. This is just me, doing my thing, making my way.
I've thot a lot about how much I really wanted to share in this blog, and I decided that I would put it all out there. The more open and honest I am, the more accountable I feel. I guess that sharing more makes it more real and exposed. More real seems easier to deal with and address. Make sense? If not, just remember; I have been living off juice for almost two days.... Who knows what will happen in a couple more days.....pictures....??
So here are the physical issues I have been facing:
PCOS (Poly cystic ovarian syndrom). That about says it. I have multiple cysts that grow on my ovaries etc. It is painful, causes a ton of hormone issues and other issues that we don't need to get into here. I think this is the main reason I have not been able to have kids and have had a very difficult time loosing weight. You can learn more here.
Endometriosis: While undergoing surgery to remove one of my cysts, my doctor found some endometriosis. I even have some lovely pictures to show of it. Now this causes real pain on a monthly basis. Also causes fertility issues and messes with hormones. Go here to learn more about that.
Hemmoroids: Nuff said. I'm not even going to put a link cuz if you don't know what it is.....just do some of your own reasearch. Needless to say, constipation is an issue I deal with on a regular basis and the discomfort and pain that goes with the little bobbins on my downstairs are a major source of irritation and pain in my life.
Headaches: Ohhhhh, the headaches! I wake up almost every morning with a headache. Let me say that this morning, I did not! I was very happy about that little change in my morning. I try all kinds of things to help ease the pain: LOTS of pain killers, massage, pressure points, essential oils, water, etc. I am also very resistant to pain killers and other medications, so I have to pound down tons of pills to get any relief.
Joint Pain: I have really bad pain in my knees, back, shoulders, and feet. Mainly my knees and feet. Of course, I am a mom and am walking around, carrying kids, cleaning etc. every day. This does not help things. The main reason for so much pain is my weight. My poor knees and feet are just tuckered out carrying around this much weight.
Fatigue: I'm too tired to write any more...... No seriously, I am always tired. For the past 3-4 months I have been naping almost every day. I can't seem to make it thru the day without a nap. I am always so tired. Again, see above issues that are adding to my fatigue problem. I know my poor health plays a part in this.
So, there it is. In all it's glory. Just two months ago I had my physical and the Dr. recommended I get on a program to loose weight, but as mentioned earlier in the blog, that is not so easy for me. I do feel blessed that I don't have other health issues related to my weight such as high blood pressure, high cholestrol, diabetes, heart disease, etc. So, I am going to take it back old school. REAL OLD school. Like when folks lived off fruits and veggies cuz there was not always meat to eat. And since I don't want to join the ranks of those who suffered scurvy while going to the old school, I am going to consume LOTS of fruits and veggies and the best way to do so is by juicing them and allowing my body to absorb the nutrients right into the blood stream.
Now, I know that juicing can be controversial. I know that it can be extreme. I know that people can be very opinionated on such topics. However, no one seemed to be concerned (or voice concern), or opinionated while I was stuffing my face with toxic sugars, fats, preservitives, and calories. All of which have done my body a lot of harm. So, I would ask that as I am making an effort to cleanse all that crap from my body, that I get support and encouragement. As I have reasearched this topic, I have yet to find an incidence where some one has said "Man, I wish I had never done a cleansing juice fast. It ruined my life". I don't plan to be all crazy about it and I am very aware of how my body is responding. I am in no way writing this blog as a guidline for others to follow. This is just me, doing my thing, making my way.
Friday, June 1, 2012
Day 1
I have been lamenting my health and weight for a long time. A really long time. In the past I have been able to jump on a diet, knock it out, loose the weight, and then conclude the diet. The aftermath is where the problem lies. It's kinda like watching the news. They show you breaking news stories and you see what is going on, but then it is over and you never see how it all ends up. The follow up is the part we think least about, what we focus on the least. The result of this is ending right back a square one.
I am a victim of my own choices. I make them and pay the price. I figure I have paid the price in hundreds of pounds lost and gained. Yet thru all that, I still end up heavier and heavier than ever. In the past few months I have really felt the pain of my decisions. Both physically and emotionally. Yet for some reason, this time I just have not been able to find it in me to do another diet, to get on another band wagon, to cash in on another pill. I guess my experience tells me that I will loose the weight, and then gain it all back again. So why bother.
Well, here I am close to my heaviest weight. Like 9 lbs away close. The worse part is all my "fat" clothes are not really fitting any more. So I am faced with a choice: Buy more clothes or loose weight. I am finally ready to loose the weight.
I watched the documentry "Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead" and it spoke to me. No complicated diet to follow. No counting calories, No pills or drops or pre-packaged foods, No meetings and No excuses. Just you, your juicer, and LOTS of fruits and veggies.
Little mister over achiever in the documentry has the time and funds to hang out in New York city for a month then travel across the US for another month. All along the way using his handy juicer in the back of his snazzy rental car. Little mister does not have 3 kids, foster kids, a spouse, a commitment to church and community and lots of house cleaning to do. I DO! But I was thinking, if I have the strenghthwithin me to run my household, be a good mom and wife and serve in my community, then why can't I find the strength within me to chuck some fruits and veggies in a machine and watch the pounds melt away. Well, I think I can! I can do hard things! As many of you know, loosing weight is HARD!
So, now that this has become somewhat of a book of an entry, I shall bring it all to a close. I am going to juice my way to health for the next 10 days. I think I will give it a break and then do it again for another 10 days. The part I am really going to have to focus on is that time when I am not on the "diet". That is where I will be tested and pushed to my limits. However, as I mentioned before, I CAN DO HARD THINGS! And I can do this.
I am a victim of my own choices. I make them and pay the price. I figure I have paid the price in hundreds of pounds lost and gained. Yet thru all that, I still end up heavier and heavier than ever. In the past few months I have really felt the pain of my decisions. Both physically and emotionally. Yet for some reason, this time I just have not been able to find it in me to do another diet, to get on another band wagon, to cash in on another pill. I guess my experience tells me that I will loose the weight, and then gain it all back again. So why bother.
Well, here I am close to my heaviest weight. Like 9 lbs away close. The worse part is all my "fat" clothes are not really fitting any more. So I am faced with a choice: Buy more clothes or loose weight. I am finally ready to loose the weight.
I watched the documentry "Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead" and it spoke to me. No complicated diet to follow. No counting calories, No pills or drops or pre-packaged foods, No meetings and No excuses. Just you, your juicer, and LOTS of fruits and veggies.
Little mister over achiever in the documentry has the time and funds to hang out in New York city for a month then travel across the US for another month. All along the way using his handy juicer in the back of his snazzy rental car. Little mister does not have 3 kids, foster kids, a spouse, a commitment to church and community and lots of house cleaning to do. I DO! But I was thinking, if I have the strenghthwithin me to run my household, be a good mom and wife and serve in my community, then why can't I find the strength within me to chuck some fruits and veggies in a machine and watch the pounds melt away. Well, I think I can! I can do hard things! As many of you know, loosing weight is HARD!
So, now that this has become somewhat of a book of an entry, I shall bring it all to a close. I am going to juice my way to health for the next 10 days. I think I will give it a break and then do it again for another 10 days. The part I am really going to have to focus on is that time when I am not on the "diet". That is where I will be tested and pushed to my limits. However, as I mentioned before, I CAN DO HARD THINGS! And I can do this.
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